Quote of the Day...

"How often do you get horny?"

- Babara Walters, asking Whoopi about her sex life on The View.

Sun-nnnny days, chasing the clouds a-wayyyyy....

What is it about sunshine that makes you feel like a kid again? I hope you are all enjoying a great sunny day wherever you may be and if not....how about some Sunday secrets to cheer you up?

Usually I post one that speaks to me in some way, but all this one said was "I'm a completely self centered biotch with no thought or respect to the countless women who have died all in the name of my FUCKING PINK BLENDER."

Just me?

A Day Late & A $1 Short...

Well aren't I a forgetful muthaf-cka lately?

Enjoy yesterday's Sunday Secrets...

PS- I KNEW it! My Blockbuster guy totally gives me the eye when I pick less than acceptable titles to him from time to time.

OK, I have laundry to do and daytime TV to rot out to. 

Being a salaried employee makes it a lot easier to justify watching The People's court when you're getting paid for it. 

Quote of the Day..

"You give me Dick Cheney,a waterboard and one hour. I'll have him confessing to the Sharon Tate murders."

-Jesse Ventura, speaking out against torture on The View.

Long Weekends Are The Best...

God bless you Queen Victoria! Another day to chillax and do nothing..AND get paid for it! Nice!

I have my best friend here, we're eating the most amazing Malaysian food and about to watch Twilight. I know. It's actually not a terrible movie. I admit, I've succumbed to the elusive Edward Cullen. Just the character. RPattz does nadda for me. I know, I know..

Anyway, us soon to be cougars need love too...lol. 

So what's hotter..Cullen or Sesame Chicken?

Tomorrow is hiking in Cathedral Forest and then a dinner with family. 

Enjoy yours!

(Image courtesy of Amy Howe Photography)

Happy Mother's Day!

Thanks Mom! You are the best, never wavering and always a fun part of every day. Whether calming your firstborn who was scared of the candle on his cake above or answering the 1am "Mom,come get me"calls from a random location, you have always been there and we love you for it.
Enjoy our picnic! Love you!

To all the Moms out there, thankyou from your sometimes ungrateful brats, me included!
Now on to Mother's Day Secrets....

Movin' House

My new realtor just left after I signed the papers to list this place.

Wow. I guess this means I have to stop smoking weed in my house and start emptying the dishwasher. And fold the laundry, wash the floors, the tile and the patio. Not to mention keeping stainless steel appliances free from fingerprints, dark floors spotless and bathtubs sparkling clean.

Everyday.

Oooooh shit.

Ok, I can do this. I'm not really a slob anyway. Sure, I can leave the bathroom a few days too long sometimes and maybe you can write your name on the dust on my DVD player once in awhile...but I think that's pretty normal. Unless you're my BFF Toxic. She cleans like a mofo morning noon and goddamn night. I stayed the weekend there and saw her vacuum 3 times and mop twice. It was fascinating. To see such a natural wonder in her own habitat was moving to such a degree I dare not go on.

The irony of her nickname is not lost on me.

Praise Jebus! I need the good gospel of Toxic to 'wash' over me.

Invoke me with the power of Mr. Clean!

Dimanche En Francais...

Cette carte m'a fait rire jusqu'à ce que j'ai pleuré. Je suis à l'écoute de la musique française à l'heure actuelle et de faire des crêpes suzette pour le brunch. Profitez de votre dimanche ...

Translation..